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“Nine times out of 10 if it go good I’m going again/$200,000 cash will turn a nigga hardhead,” raps Nutty, before the film ends with a detective-who thinks he’s Denzel in Inside Man-giving an impassioned speech about drugs in the streets. The scene cuts quickly to Los and Nutty performing “Heroin Charges” on a cop car. We’re flash-forwarded to a police procedural scene, where cops determine that the suburbanite and a friend overdosed. But after some convoluted shadiness and an unnecessary choice to have the white actor drop a few N-bombs, the second deal ends tragically, like most Los and Nutty songs do.
The ominous lighting, frigid weather, and uneasiness of the characters let us know the ending will inevitably be twisted. The suburbanite ends up making a call to a drug dealer, who is selling out of his grandmother’s house (another Los and Nutty trope) and agrees to meet him. Their new seven-minute, self-directed short film for “6 N Da Morning” and “Heroin Charges” opens with a recurring character in Los and Nutty’s Panagnl4e trilogy: the suburban white dude who leaves the comfort of his neighborhood in search of drugs, played by an actor who looks like he could’ve been an extra in Good Will Hunting. Ja is clearly ready for his own finance show on CNBC.
headline of the week: “ Ja Rule Is Pissed After Robinhood App Restricts Stock Trading: ‘Do Not Sell!’” It’s kind of corny and definitely has #brandedcontent vibes, but who would you rather see make corny branded content than Fat Joe? “The life you live is so inspiring,” Khaled tells Joe in the video. Joe attempts to be uplifting, but he really just tells us how great his life is: unlimited Fenty and D’usse, courtside Knicks tickets, trips to Turks and Caicos, and, of course, a shitload of silk shirts. On the song, he glides over a mashup of Rihanna’s “Kiss It Better” and Luther Vandross’ “Never Too Much” by the producer Amorphous that sounds like it would fit perfectly in one of DJ D-Nice’s IG Live sets. ( According to Ja Rule, both he and Fat Joe really were kidnapped in Africa by an evil concert promoter who also once kidnapped DMX.) The video then transitions to vacation-ready shots of Fat Joe: at the beach, on a massive boat, in a mansion with gorgeous views, rocking the type of flowing button-downs Pablo Escobar probably wore, and dancing with a drink in his hand as if Southern Florida isn’t a COVID-19 hotspot. He got kidnapped in Africa!” yells Diddy, as if it’s a humble brag. “This is Crack, one of the world’s most famous graffiti artists.
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If you want the full experience of “Sunshine (The Light),” I recommend watching the music video, which begins with a ridiculous toast led by Diddy and DJ Khaled.
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“Sunshine (The Light)” is the latest Joe song primed to dominate NYC and South Florida radio stations, to play at timeouts of sporting events, to drift out of the bluetooth speaker of the dude in the subway who still wears his Yankee fitted with a backwards tilt like 50 Cent in the “Many Men” video, to probably end up in a Carnival Cruise Line commercial, and most importantly, to make us feel like it’s summer in January.
But now, Fat Joe is back again (and no, I’m not talking about the “inspirational” OnlyFans page he recently launched with DJ Khaled). Personally, I thought he had already done that before he resurfaced on 2016’s Remy Ma-assisted “All the Way Up”-a moment that felt like watching a basketball player who you thought was washed up get traded and have a career renaissance.
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There have been countless times when Fat Joe, who turned 50 last year, could have just purchased a beachside condo in Miami and proceeded to spend all of his time sipping free bottles of Cîroc until the inevitable lifetime achievement awards began to roll in.